In 1997 I was six; but this was still a pretty big year for me. My adult family getting dressed up and leaving my behind for one of the most important nights our that could happen in 1997- a trip to the pictures! Apparently Titanic and The Full Monty wasn’t age appropriate. To this day I can smell the cloud of Anais my mother, Gran and Auntie had drenched the selves in.

I also remember people actually paying attention to the general election. I couldn’t walk home from school with my mum without someone in the street stopping her and talking about the election, who would they vote for and why, what were my Mum’s thoughts? I didn’t think much of it at the time but given the context of growing up in a dying ex-mining town, and the current state of our collective political consciousness; It would seem that in hindsight this was a pretty big deal.

This mindfulness of political understanding hung around for a while, I remember constantly being told the importance of voting. My Granddad, would always instil in me the significance of what it meant, he would also on occasion when we bumped into someone who happened to have a view that was different to his own would always utter, “opinions are like arse holes Sam, everybody’s got one.” At ten this seemed clever and naughty because Granddad has used a naughty word; but now when I try to apply this phrase to members of my own generation, (the 18-24s,) who do so love their Big Brother, Towie and women with sofa cushions surgically stuffed into their backsides. I can but only come to one conclusion:

We have now evolved, (the nineties kids,) to a species of human beings that do not all have arese holes. I have noticed this by the lack of opinion hovering around but also by the infinite amount of useless defecation that pours out of their mouths. There couldn’t possibly be an alternative exit.

Now I am, perhaps hypocritically, not going to continue writing and progress to my own political view- how I came by it and who I will ultimately be voting for. No. All I wish to state on that note is that I can confirm that I am one of the few nineties children that appear to have retained that particular sphincter and also an opinion.

We are in a sorry state. Forget for a second, the NHS crisis, The lack of job opportunities for the young or the fact that every leader of the main political parties look like they’re made from the parts of a pig that cannot be legally squished into a sausage, (all red, shiny and wiry hair.) The worst of all is that none of us are bloody voting! We’re at a point now where it doesn’t matter who you vote for, whatever the outcome none of us are going to have life altering experiences where we feel inspired and supportive of our government in a churchill type fever. But whoever gets into power in the next general election will be around for a good few years- my fellow peers wouldn’t commit to a hair colour for that long without careful consideration. Make sure someone gets into power who will ensure that you will be able to afford your bloody hair dye by remaining employed and keeping tax on cosmetics low, if that’s your bag.

The political parties ignore the youth vote because it is not valued by the people who own it. How can you expect someone to get up and fight your corner when you are too busy facing the other way deciding whether to get the latest Phone in black or white. You want to stop working for free in internships? you want to earn a salary rather than surviving on a zero hour contract? Be part of society and make someone who can affect those decisions care about you. If that fails at least use your vote and do the young people who really do care a favour by bringing about strength in numbers.